Christmas on Ice - it's cold.

On Demand from the Lifetime Channel

 

A Christmas movie about an ice rink. How original.

 

This one starts off with our main character Courtney ice skating on a rink in a quaint town. A little girl is struggling to skate so Courtney helps her up and gives her a mini lesson on how to skate. While her mother is next to her, aforementioned mother doesn’t have any qualms about a random stranger taking her daughters hand and telling her how to skate. Also little girl has no stranger danger. I call BS Lifetime.

 

Later on Courtney is closing down the rink for the night and the mayor calls (who just so happens to be her roommates boss) and tells her he wants to see her in the a.m..

Courtney asks Zamboni driver to cover for her. He does but only if she sets him up with her roommate. Because that is professional behavior Mr Zamboni.

 

She tells roommate that evening, while baking cupcakes for the mayor because she is nervous about the meeting. Also not professional Courtney.  Cupcake bribery? So 2010. 

 

Roommate also dresses like an elf for pics with Santa because apparently the mayors office doesn’t pay her enough. Courtney tells roommate that she should make a book about screaming children with Santa. NEWS FLASH. Its probably already been done. 

 

Ok I was right. It has been done. “Scared of Santa: Scenes of Terror in Toyland” was published in 2008. I did not make that up. Google it.

Back to this flick. 

 

Next day. Courtney is in mayors office. Meets hottie McHotterton hockey player Noah coming out of mayors office. How do they meet? By literally bumping into each other, he drops his papers, she apologizes. Literally these movies have so many characters meet by a collision of sorts. I don’t know about you but I just don’t collide with that many strangers in my life. Maybe that’s why I am still single. But I digress.

 

Mayor tells her that the rink has to close. Hottie McHotterton has opened an indoor rink in the ”canal” district, so the city doesn’t have to pay for the free public rink anymore. He tells her they are closing it down after the holidays AND cancelling the Christmas carnival. 

She is MAD. Mayor tells her they need a Christmas miracle. Courtney “OK I will get to work on a Christmas miracle.” AND she still gives him the cupcakes. You can tell the dialog is riveting. 

 

Next day random child turns out to be Noahs daughter, and that wasn’t her mom. Child’s mom, Noah’s wife (also the mayors daughter) died of melanoma a couple of years ago.

 

Noah is single, looking to mingle. So he signs his daughter up for lessons with Courtney. Courtney wins over daughter in no time. 

Courtney goes to check out Noah’s indoor ice rink. STOP THE PRESSES. Apparently this is set in Worchester. Worchester folks, is there a canal district? Pretty sure there aren’t canals in Worchester. 

 

Noah asks Courtney out for coffee. Offers her a job teaching skating at the indoor rink. She tells him where to shove it. And tells him to work with her to save the outdoor ice rink. He mansplains a bit.

 

She falls in love. Like you do. 

 

She tries to fundraise to save the rink. She is a really poor fundraiser. So instead she comes up with a campaign to save it by having people bombard the mayor with Christmas cards telling him to save the rink. 

 

Mayor is very Scrooge-like. He is GRUMPY.

 

Mayor decides to hold the Christmas Carnival at Noah’s rink. Noah doesn’t have a choice. 

Courtney is mad. Noah avoids her instead of dealing with the conflict head on. 

They argue. There goes that Christmas miracle. 

 

She skates alone on the ice at night. Like you do when having an emo moment. CALAMITY. She falls. Cries on the ice. Remembers injury that took her out of professional skating. Zamboni driver who is now in love with her roommate helps her off the ice. Him “I’ll take you to the hospital.: Her” No just take me home I can’t deal with the hospital right now.” Cause that’s wise Courtney. 

 

Courtney talks to the mayor. Stops telling him to spend money on statues and instead name rink after his daughter. WHABAM Christmas miracle!

 

Ice skating saves lives.

Support your local rink. 

This movie is incredibly white. Like one person of color. In the whole thing.

 

Courtney and Noah live happily ever after. On the ice.